A Beautiful Mess

by Denise Barbarita

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1.
FAR FROM THE MADDENING CROWD People Everywhere Solitude is Rare (I want to) Run Away, Far away Far Away from the Maddening Crowd I Dream of Open Space A Sunlight Drenched Escape (I want to) Run Away, Far Away Far from the Thunder of Oncoming Trains Run Away, Far Away Go Out, Into the Big Sky There I’ll Find A Peace of Mind Miles of Quiet This Body Weighs Me Down Firmly Planted to the Ground (I want to) Run Away, Far Away Far Away from the Maddening Crowd Bend My Will To Be A Songbird Gliding Free (I want to) Fly Away, Far Away Fly from the Clamour of Urban Malaise
2.
K sera sera the world keeps spinning K sera sera we all move on If today has got you down just turn around (repeat) © 2009, Denise Barbarita/MyShyTune Music Publishing/BMI
3.
POISONWOOD TREE Safe in the shade of my poisonwood tree Shaking and seething in disbelief My sunken eyes peek through the leaves How have I found comfort and solace in this,.. pain Went from 1st born favorite to latch key I’m being played like a puzzle piece Forced in a corner then brushed off to the side Cuz I don’t fit,.. in There’s no room for grey it’s now black and white It’s a one sided game I’m either with you or not You see me as something that needs to be fixed Cuz I don’t fit,.. in You look at me through drunken eyes You don’t hear the cries from your wounded child Covered in scabs and dirt from falling head first Trying to fit,.. in You taught me to think independently So why be surprised by my questioning You were the one who said I could do anything If I tried And I tried So why can’t I fit in? Why couldn’t I stop this? I couldn’t stop this from happening Safe in the shade of my poisonwood tree Eating the same fruit that’s killing me Hiding behind this fortress of guilt Layers of fat under blistered skin And I tried I couldn’t stop this from happening Forgive me ©2007 MyShyTune Music Publishing
4.
I don’t Like You I don’t like you, I won’t apologize I don’t like you, it won’t come as a surprise Yes sharing this secret, it makes me feel guilty Cuz all I ever wanted was to love uncondition’ly Pretending to give a shit makes me feel queasy So now I think it’s time for some brutal honesty (Chorus) I thought I could revive my deepest desire To reflect on your good points rather than the reviled I tried to pretend that we could be friends But the closest emotion I can get to is contempt (chorus) {breakdown} I don’t like you, on this we can agree If you don’t like me it will come as a relief It’s true I find you shallow and way too verbose Perhaps you find me caustic and a bit too precocious Let’s drop all this pretense and dishonesty You know You don’t like me, I don’t like you No apologies are necessary ©2008 MyShyTune Music Publishing/BMI Words & Music by Denise Barbarita
5.
IT’S WHAT YOU SAID don’t play dumb you feed on insecurities a vampire to my senses insulting my integrity always so coy boy you’d better wake up i’ve given up you’re on your own you’re falling down i won’t go with you it’s so easy to be mr zero responsibility it’s just always my fault isn’t that what you said? stand up strait boy you’ve got a lot to learn all you can do is take you’re a slave to your misery always so sure well you’d better wake up i’ve given up you’re on your own ©1999 MyShyTune Music Publishing/Denise Barbarita/BMI
6.
DO IT AGAIN say the word and i'll be right up by that door take two steps to the sign marked "go" and days they run together just like white paint spread on a white wall break my fall then... say you will i said just do it again and take your time this time i said just do it again it's so real and yes i'm still falling seeing through you like a waterglass in the morning just say i'll be better on my own i crave a change of season maybe something blue i can't see through break my fall then... © 1998 MyShyTune Music Publishing/Denise Barbarita/BMI
7.
Truth Telling You can’t find the the right way You can’t find the words to say You’re lonely You don’t want to create waves And so you choose to hesitate You stay In the same place Sad and lonely (never changing) With Hope your heart stays open Still filled with mixed emotion Afraid to wake Every day is the same With Hope your heart stays open Still filled with mixed emotion Each day you wake you can’t escape Break, Try to break away You can’t seem to explain You feel life’s a living grave It’s left you craving You don’t need to be ashamed for feeling helpless and afraid you say you’re finally facing truth embracing letting go of fear of changes Don’t say it’s too late A heart open to Truth telling Is the only way (chorus) ©2008 MyShyTuneMusic Words by Denise Barbarita/ Music by DB/JW
8.
September Sun A summer made to make amends (it came) and went As I shuddered with a sigh And with the yellow harvest moon I bloomed With insight I never laughed so loud before then I never danced with raw abandon Before that day it was always me against the world Then I stopped running I just stopped running away I found my home In the warm September sun Feels like I woke up from a dream I can’t believe When I hear echoes of past doubts in mind I used to feel so out of place But now I’m fearless I never laughed so loud before then I never danced with raw abandon Before that day it was always me against the world Then I stopped running I just stopped running away I found my home In the warm September sun ©2008 MyShyTune Music/Words & Music by Denise Barbarita
9.
Ballad of the lost soul I’m on my knees I crave release Forgive me for Any wrongs I’ve done I take the lead Unconsciously Above the fold Searching for my home I’m a soul without a body I’m a ship lost out at sea And this voice sings of faded memories I’m a soul without a body I’m a ship lost out at sea And I hope someone will remember me Forgetful of What it means to love Is a life defined By what’s left behind Now out of sight And out of mind I choose to live Where the sea meets sky I’m a soul without a body I’m a ship lost out at sea And this voice sings of faded memories I’m a soul without a body I’m a ship lost out at sea And I hope someone will remember me ©2008 MyshytuneMusic/BMI; Words by Denise Barbarita, music by Denise Barbarita & Francis MBappe
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11.
4. Suckers (free) 03:51
Suckers You’d sell insurance to the dead You’ll selling moonbeams in a monogrammed case You’d sell a pony with no legs Go count your money and forget about it (chorus) You want yours now you gotta get yours now And you don’t care who you hurt You know you want it, you gotta get yours now And you don’t care who gets burned Cuz we’re all suckers anyway You pray to God to make you rich Expecting forgiveness as you rape and pillage You don’t want you’re legacy to die Singing songs of salvation while you torch the sky Chorus © 2006 MyShyTune Music Publishing/BMI, Words & Music by Denise Barbarita

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Brand new CD from Denise Barbarita, featuring her band, The Morning Papers. Reviews coming soon!

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released November 19, 2010

Tracking Engineer: Robert L Smith
Add'l Recording/Mix Engineer: Denise Barbarita
Mastering Engineer: Alan Silverman
Assistant Engineers: Ariosto Arias, Jon Silverman, Jon Altschuler

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Denise Barbarita New York, New York

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